When a loved one passes away, the time that follows can feel overwhelming. You’re grieving, but also need to handle practical matters. Here is what to do first when someone dies:

Immediate Steps (Within the First Hours)

1. Get a Legal Pronouncement of Death: This is the very first thing. If your loved one died in a hospital or hospice, the medical staff will handle it. If they passed away at home, immediately call 911 for assistance. Paramedics will come and transport the deceased to a hospital for an official death pronouncement.
2. Contact a Funeral Home, Mortuary, or Crematorium: After a legal pronouncement is made, contact a funeral home. They will arrange for the deceased to be picked up from the hospital, hospice center, or home, and guide you through the next steps. Contact any of our locations 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Early Steps (Within the First Days)

1. Contact Relatives and Clergy: Notify close family and friends about the passing. Also, contact any clergy members (priests, rabbis, ministers, etc.) you wish to involve and discuss potential dates and times for services like wakes, funerals, and memorials. Be sure to confirm their availability, as their schedules can be busy.
2. Follow Up on Life Insurance: If your loved one had life insurance, try to leave the hospital with any initial paperwork or documentation you need to begin filing a claim. It’s often easier to get these details while you’re there.
3. Make Plans for Your Loved One’s Home: Ask a trusted friend, relative, or neighbor to keep an eye on the house. This includes caring for any pets, accepting food and gifts, taking calls, and ensuring the home is secure. Many people who don’t know who else to contact might try to visit the house. Having someone there helps you manage visitors and receive support.
4. Confirm a Funeral Director and Begin Arrangements: The funeral home you contacted will assign a funeral director. Work with them to start making funeral arrangements. This includes deciding between cremation or burial, and determining immediate details like the date, time, casket, and location for services. If your loved one pre-planned, find those documents to streamline the process. If not, consider enlisting a sibling or other close relative to help with the planning.
5. Look for a Will or Planning Organizer: Search for any documents that might outline your loved one’s wishes regarding their funeral service and burial. If you or your loved one had an attorney, it’s a good time to provide them with any documents or confirm they have them on file. Even if no explicit wishes exist, a quick search through old files might reveal clues, like information about a cemetery they once considered.
6. Finalize Obituaries and Eulogies: Work on the content for obituaries and eulogies. Provide any written material for publication (online or in print) to the funeral director, website, or newspaper. Share any printed content with a close friend or relative to ensure all details are accurate and nothing essential has been missed.
7. Finalize Funeral Plans: Confirm all the details for the funeral, including flowers, music, and any military benefits. Ensure you’ve notified relatives, friends, co-workers, and neighbors so they can make plans to attend the service.
8. Notify the Post Office: Arrange to have all mail forwarded to you or another trusted relative. This mail can be incredibly valuable, as it might contain information about accounts or contacts you hadn’t considered.

Ongoing Steps (In the Coming Weeks and Months)

1. Track Gifts, Notes, and Well Wishes: Keep a record of all the gifts, notes, and expressions of sympathy you receive. Plan to send thank-you notes and acknowledgments in the coming days and weeks. This is a task where a friend or relative can often provide great assistance.
2. Make Essential Payments: Ensure ongoing payments for things like the mortgage and car installments are made. Even if you plan to sell these assets, maintaining payments prevents ownership or liability issues. If you aren’t the executor or lack the means, speak with the probate attorney or estate administrators immediately.
3. Contact Key Agencies, Insurance Providers, and Financial Institutions: While the funeral director often contacts the Social Security office, confirm this, and if not, reach out yourself. You’ll also need to cancel insurance policies and provide information related to the will and financial accounts to a probate attorney.
4. Collect Documents for Probate: Gather all necessary documents to finalize the probate process. This includes funeral and death certificates, the will, birth certificates, Social Security information, marriage licenses, and deeds to homes, cars, and other major property.

Ask for Help if You Need It

By keeping critical papers, documents, and wishes organized and on hand, families can tackle much of this arduous work more quickly and easily. If you haven’t planned ahead, ask for your Free Personal Planning Organizer.

However, if the deceased left no final wishes or clear next steps, or if the information you need is in a bit of disarray, don’t panic. Ask friends or relatives for help putting the pieces together and ensuring both the funeral and journey that follows align with your loved one’s life and ongoing expectations.

Take a breath and move forward, one step at a time — it can be a painful process, especially in the beginning, but one that’s essential to gaining closure and celebrating your loved one’s life.

Indiana Memorial Group Blog